and then there were four


Baby boy was born a little more than a week ago, and I have to say, I am loving this whole newborn thing ( much as you can love that newborn thing). Lack of sleep is no bueno, but when you're getting more sleep than you ever did with your first hellion of a newborn, I'd call that a win. 

Meet Merrill.
He is sweet and mellow.
He has chubby cheeks and reddish brown hair that curls when it's wet (yay!!).
We like to call him Mo
Sometimes he looks a lot like his sister and a little bit like Dale, but the older he gets, the more his own look shines through. Some people (my mom) try to make me feel better by saying he looks more like me (thanks).

June 22nd was my due date, and it came and went without much incident. Except that one incident when Viv accidentally shattered my ipad. that sucked. Made my lack-of-baby-on-due-date day just thaaaaat much better [insert sarcasm here]. but you know. Shit happens.

At my appointment the next day, I decided to take the jump and set an induction date since NOOOOOOTHINNNNNG was happening. I mean nothing. WTH.

The date was set for the 24th at 8 AM.
I wasn't too happy about having an induction, and it turned out to be a long labor that included ice chips, popsicles, really slow contractions and an epidural that ended up not working for most of my labor.

To say that this labor was harder than my last is a severe really wasn't fun (ha. ha. ha.). And it had me questioning how people live through childbirth and why anyone would ever choose to deliver a baby without the drugs and how I was probably going to die in the process and how if I did by some miracle survive this that I was going to murder Dale for doing this to me.

Yes. It was bad.
But after much shaking and puking and pep talks and swearing and giving up, they gave me a cocktail of drugs that helped slightly and I was able to NOT die and get that damn baby out of me.

And 3 pushes later at approximately 6:21 PM:
Merrill was born.

A squishy, cheeky, curly-haired boy with a tiny little wail and a little bruised face.
7 pounds 12 ounces of baby, 19 inches long, a full pound heavier than his sister.

He was beautiful. With Viv, I didn't fall in love until about a week after she was born. But him? I instantly fell in love with the kid, and there was so much joy and relief that he was finally here, that he was safe and healthy and mine and I wasn't in pain anymore, or pregnant, hallelujah.

They put him on my chest and he cried a little cry and then lay there quietly. Every once in a while he let out a big squawk and then stopped, observing the things around him. I just couldn't believe how sweet he was, and I didn't want to let him go.

So many endorphins....those things are the shiz. They don't mess around.

I was so excited for Viv to meet Merrill, so we got her up there as quick as we could (thanks mom). My heart probably grew 20 sizes when I saw my now giant baby girl walk in the room with a big grin on her face and we showed her the baby we'd been talking about for months. I don't know if she grasped the concept, but she sure loved him right away. She held him and giggled when he moved his feet, and laughed when he blinked his eyes. She has been so sweet with him since, asking to hold him, and always waving to him, smothering him with hugs and kissing him straight on the mouth whenever she can. I love it.

After that it's mostly just a big hospital blur or sleeplessness and recovery. We did the whole hospital thing (which was really too long) and enjoyed the hospital food (but not really) and got some really great sleep on those hospital pillows (right?) and got bombarded by nurses trying to tell me how to nurse (thanks but no thanks).

One nurse told us to stay in the hospital as long as we could, bond with the baby and get some rest. But the hospital is anything but restful, and we missed Viv and our own bed a whole whole bunch. We couldn't wait to break out of there.

So we did. And then we went home.

The first thing Viv asked us when we got home that day was if Merrill wanted to come play blocks in her room. So he did, and she loved it. They have been instant friends ever since, laying in her bed together at bedtime, holding hands and her asking how his day was and if he had fun? She has been incredibly sweet with him...I didn't think I could love her more, but I was most definitely wrong.

And surprisingly, the transition from only child to sibling life has gone more smoothly than I could have imagined. The two-year-old tantrums have intensified only slightly and I'm pretty happy about that.


Since then, it's felt so natural and wonderful and I feel like it has always been this way.
It's always been us.
I love our little family.
We love Mo.

He's the sweetest thing; so very chill. He lets me sleep entirely too much (entirely...I can't complain even a tiny bit right now)(knock on wood). He makes nursing seem easy, and the kid hardly ever cries. He has the most beautiful eyes, and he looks incredibly sweet when they're open. I love that little face of his.

Can you tell I'm completely in love with the little boyfriend?
This baby nonsense is already a complete 180 from my experience with Viv.

Now, he's only a week old, and I fully expect things to go haywire in the next week or two, with him or my hormones, but as of right now, I'm taking the days one at a time, appreciating the good when it's good. So far it's been really good, and i'm enjoying it while it lasts.

I think there's something about your second that lets you appreciate everything so much more. You know that the crying and sleepless nights will be worth it. You know that things get better eventually and that the sweet newborn cry and soft skin and kissable rolls will be gone in the blink of an eye. 

I hold him way more than I probably should, I don't like to share him, and I'm kind of obsessed with him. And I'm ok with that. 

If I've learned anything about babyhood, it's that they grow up entirely too fast.
And I'm not wishing this one away.

We love you so much, Mo.
Thanks for reminding me how great this can be.


  1. This post made me so happy! I'm soooo glad everything has gone smoothly and that you are just so in love with him! He sounds like a dream. What a sweetie! I'm so happy for you and Dale and sweet Viv now that she has a sibling. Congrats to you all! :)

  2. this post is incredible and these photos are to die for cute! so happy for you!

  3. Such a sweet post! Love the name! Love the pictures! Viv looks like she's a great big sis! Congrats!

  4. What a great post. You have a wonderful perspective on things. They do grow up in a blink of an eye, he is beautiful!

  5. That is so sweet. Isn't it amazing how big #1 is now!!

  6. So, so beautiful. Congratulations! These pictures are just gorgeous. What a special sweet baby.

  7. mmmm i love newborns. besides the lack of sleep and bleeding nipples (on my part) too much?? whatever. your little one looks like such a sweety and i'm so happy for ya! sorry about that labor, though. yuck.



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