New York, Schmuyork: State Fair


Ah, Fair season. The smell of fried food, body odor and a hint of carnie smoke. 'Tis the season for carnivals and fairs, and I can't get enough of it. Small fact about me: I love carnivals. I love every white trash thing about them. too much skin covered in too many weird tattoos? Check. Too many clogged arteries and missing teeth? Check. Too many overpriced stuffed animals that need to be deloused and lysoled into oblivion? Check But you know what? It does it for me. For some reason, I think I'm on of the few.

A couple Saturdays ago, I dragged Dale and Viv up to Syracuse to experience the fullness of times and happiness at the Great New York State Fair. So, this fair is said to be huge. As in Hilary Clinton always attends and President Obama was probably going to make an appearance. I never can miss a chance to see my two favorite political figures in the flesh, you know? It had to happen.

It was hot. it was humid. it was crowded. There was no shortage of people who didn't look at themselves in the mirror that morning.

But we three had a grand 'ole time scoping out the greasiest food booths and the dirties carnies. We spent most of our day around the animals. At the cows, Viv walked around moooooing her little heart out. At the goats, she kept trying to get them to lick her fingers and grabbing their ears. At the rabbits, she cowered and wouldn't touch them (weird? yes, since her favorite stuffed animal is a bunny).

As for me, my favorite part of carnivals are the pretty colors and spinning rides. I can't ride them (unless I feel like puking all day), but I sure love hearing the screams and carnival music with the crazy blinking lights and bright flags flapping in the breeze.

At lunch time, we decided to let each other pick something for the other to eat. 
Thusly, Dale ate a donut burger. As in 2 donuts for buns, a hamburger patty with all the fixins and topped with lots of maple syrup. Ugh. Just thinking of it makes me want to go run a marathon so I don't die of coronary artery disease. But, you know. All in the name of good food, right?

Side note: it wasn't as bad as it sounded, but we couldn't finish it between the two of us. 

 At the end, we bought some overpriced cotton candy (which neither of us like) just so we could give Viv her first taste, thinking she'd love it. She didn't.

Luckily, Viv attracts little girls like mad, and random kids ended up dancing around us, using all our baby wipes and finishing off our cotton candy.

As the day started to cool off and our headaches set in, we sat in the cool grass while Viv ran after all the bigger kids. We heard that Carly Rae Jeppson was supposed to play a concert that night. Dale reeeeallly wanted to watch her perform, so we waited and waited and waited an hour or so for her to show up.

Lo and behold, we got Phil Vasser instead. Turns out you actually have to pay to see Carly perform in a different arena. Poor Dale. Got his hopes dashed. Mine were dashed earlier when I realized I wouldn't see my two favorites, Hillary and Barack. Damn the luck.

I finally dragged Dale and his deflated hope balloon away from the fair and we made our trek home.
Obviously our blood wasn't laden with enough sugar, so we had to stop at an A&W drive-in to get rootbeer floats (we got lost multiple times. Tensions were high and Dale was adamant we were getting rootbeer. At 10 PM. Cue Viv meltdown. Can you even imagine?). Heaven help me. It was a long day.

Carnies, why you gotta be so fulfilling?
Good times, you know?

My one regret is that I didn't get the deep fried Oreo, just to see what it was like. Or maybe a deep fried PB&J. Anything really. There was even a booth that promised to deep fry anything you brought to them. The possibilities! Such is the life. I want to live there.

Moral of the story: The way to my heart is through fairs and carnival rides and deep fried calories 
It's the essence of summer to me. What a great way to bid farewell to the warm weather and humidity, right? Please tell me I'm not the only one that thinks so.


  1. Oh I wanted to go to the Iowa state fair just for the fried food!! Haha i feel like its and excuse ;) Sounds like a blast! Such a beautiful family!!

  2. I laughed so hard reading this. I miss you! Wish we were state fair-ing together. And Viv-way too old looking. Unacceptable!

  3. This makes me so sad as I just missed my hometown fair. You hit the nail right on the head though with your descriptions. Haha.

  4. Loving these pictures! That first one... oh my goodness! Glad you're having fun in NY!


  5. Girl, you make me laugh. Let's hang out and do nothing. No. Really.

  6. Girl, you make me laugh. Let's hang out and do nothing. No. Really.



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