pet peevies

7.09.2011

Pet Peeves.

We all have them, am I right?

Maybe some of you hate it when the toilet paper is facing the wrong way.
Maybe your husbands pee on the toilet seat and leave it.
Maybe you hate it when people pick their nose in the car when they think no one's looking (guilty).

Possibilities are endless, really.

I used to think I was a chill person.
 When Dale and I got married, we knew that we would have to let things slide.

He'd have to get used to us being late all the time. And never getting his way. and drooling over my perfect self. Tough life right?

I'd have to get used to dirty socks on the floor and his used band-aids scattered around. And his incessant snoring. And the way he obsessively uses nose spray. And....ya....that really IS a tough life.

But aside from all of the things I've let slide, there are some things that have been proven time and again. 

Presenting: 
My Top 5 Pet Peeves That 
Have Lasted The Test Of Time

5When people spell things wrong/spell frequent sayings wrong/use words wrong in public forums.
Example: Don't take it for granite (granted). I love being apart of a team (a part). I eat ice cream alot (a lot). Or...my personal favorite... Happy FORTH of July! Come on now. You must have failed English.



4.Guys leaving the toilet seat up.
Like that one time when when I told Dale he needed to start putting the toilet seat down pretty please, and that very same night at 3 AM, I go to pee, and I fall in the toilet. Swear word. Fist of rage. 


3. When people don't read closely enough and therefore say my first AND last name wrong. 
Ellis? Elsie? Alice? Elisa? Idiot?
And how hard is Beard? Yes you dork patrol, like the stuff growing from your chin. 
You should have seen my maiden name. Good luck with that one (it's Tavoian, by the way).


2. Movies vs. Books
Example: Since when does Harry Potter have blue eyes? In the movie, he does. In the book? Ya, we all know he got his bright green eyes from Lilly. Whatev. I swear, the EASIEST stuff in the book, they leave out of the movie. I don't get it. I just don't get it. (ps. Do you have tickets to the midnight showing of HP? I do. It's gonna be epic.)




1. Shopping carts left in the parking lot.
Example: today, I was sitting in the Ace parking lot, noshing on a huge slice of New York Pizza, looking at how lame Twitter is, and waiting for Dale to get his screws. A nice looking guy wearing a Giants shirt with a baby and a wife unloads his cart, and then proceeds to take it to the nearest cement tree planter and props the wheels right up there! The worst part? THE DESIGNATED SHOPPING CART PLACE WAS RIGHT NEXT TO IT!! Seriously you lazy, Giants-wearing man? Seriously?

I have been known to get out of the car and gather all of the lone shopping carts from the parking lot and stack them in the designated area. Dale rolls his eyes and ducks his head when I insist on doing it. But come ON people!

Now you know. I am officially a raunchy biotch in real life. 

Am I offending people on this blog?
Is that why my followers count is so low?

It must be. 
Sorry readers.
My other pet peeve is when people tell me I'm a biotch. 
Don't even try it.


ps. What are YOUR pet peeves?

pps. If you're one of those I-love-everything-everyone-in-the-whole-world-does-plus-rainbows-and-unicorns-and-world-peace type of people (or you live in Berkeley), I found you a website, and if you look at it, you'll probably find something to be annoyed at. And it's ok if this post is your pet peeve. I'm fine with that. Get Annoyed.

11 comments:

  1. Seriously freind...I absolutely love you! I am seacretly buged buy all thos theengs two! HAHA JK but really! You are FREAKING hilarious! Keep em comin! I am still your loyal follower! :) Miss ya much!
    PS Thanks for all your comments on my blog...there's something about a good comment that makes your day! haha

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  2. I hate the shopping cart thing too! Come on people!

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  3. You crack me up, Elyse!
    And you've inspired me to finally write my own pet peeves post!
    So, if you want to see what my top 5 contenders are, click here:
    http://myblogofblahblahblah.blogspot.com/2011/07/pet-peeves.html

    ReplyDelete
  4. I love your hate rants! haha. One time my friend and I went around Wal-Mart collecting all of the carts thinking we were being so nice and the guy working actually got mad at us!

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  5. -when Tyler messes up the nicely made bed
    -open shower curtain
    -toothpaste/spit left in sink
    -when Tyler dirties 5000000 cups in one day
    -stupid drivers= road rage
    -breastfeeding in public... that's why they make bathrooms and cars and houses
    Thats all I can think of right now :)

    ReplyDelete
  6. LOL! I love you!

    -crappy parking/people that think their car is awesome enough for 2 spots which by the way, makes me want to key their car.
    -tailgater
    -stupid people
    -Drivers who signal after they make a lane change, thanks for that after thought
    -people who play video games all day

    p.s. I totally agree with the shopping cart thing, until you have 2 screaming kids and you don't have enough hands to take them and the cart back, but with that said, it is still a pet peeve of mine which is why I always park right next to the cart return even if it means parking as far away from the store as possible. And before kids i used to be a cart gatherer too. lol. Glad i'm not the only one!

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  7. you are so funny! Thanks for making my day!

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  8. HA! New follower to add to your follower count! Yay for you...

    BUT...

    I'm a single momma...I SWEAR I try and park close to the cart return but sometimes...SOMETIMES I have to just drop the cart next to my car...

    I'm SORRY!


    xo

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  9. I think a little pee just came out! Seriously, i love your blogs "Elsie." And if people are so uptight and have a problem with your blog they need to go piss on themselves cuz they're nutt-oes! But anywho... pet peeves, pet peeves... I'll do a blog...check there :)

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  10. I have a lot, but NUMBER 1 is people who eat loud! Cannot stand it!! Haha love you girl. Your blog is hilarious!

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  11. Oh, and how funny that there is another Dani on here. This could get confusing :)

    ReplyDelete

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